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Sub Rosa

Chapter Five


Disclaimer: I still don't own Gundam Wing. Dammit.

Note: Thank you SO much for everyone who has left messages and reviews for me! I love you all! Snowdragonct, Edo, and Jen – thank you all especially, who try to review each chapter. This also goes out to Dimitriv696, kiggy, wind dancer, Jackie, pale_aspirations, Lena/Leeca, corycaly, Light, and morning_glory. I don't say thanks enough, and I should. So thank you all. *bows*

Sub Rosa

Chapter Five


Note: This is the past. Thank you.


“Wufei!” Heero scrambled over to his partner, laying cover fire for himself. Hell of a bust. Hell of a fuck-up.

“I'm okay,” Wufei gasped, clutching his arm. “You?”

“Unharmed,” Heero clipped out, ripping his shirt, then Wufei's. With an expert hand, he tied the makeshift bandage to Wufei's bloody arm. It was only a glancing blow, but it bled pretty badly.

“We could use some serious help right about now,” Wufei snapped, obviously pissed.

“We were supposed to report back two hours ago. Une knows us – she'll see something's wrong.”

“Fucking mole,” Wufei ground out.

Of a mole's existence they were absolutely certain. This bust was supposed to be one of the biggest busts of the year – no, the biggest bust of the year, possibly the biggest bust since the start of Preventors. And they had a fucking mole.

“We need to find a place to hide,” Heero said grimly. “Until back-up arrives...”

“Heero...” Wufei shook his head. They both knew the chances of getting help in time was slim at best.

“I'm not going down,” Heero growled.

Wufei smirked. “The hell you're going to live longer than me,” he agreed.

Heero peeked quickly over their tiny slab of building. The place was like a warzone. Whoever had been unfortunate enough to be in this part of the town could very well be dead by now. Heero didn't want to think about that.

They pushed their way forward, one small footstep at a time. It was two hours later when they found somewhere they could hide – if only they could get there.

“An underground highway,” Heero hissed. Long abandoned as a transportation service due to the danger of breaking down the colony's fragile structuring, it was the perfect place to hide. There were far too many twists and turns for the soldiers to easily find them, even if they realized that was where Heero and Wufei had squirreled themselves away.

“We need a smoke bomb,” Wufei hissed. Unfortunately, they'd already used them up when the enemies had suddenly turned on their exact location and fired.

Heero hissed. “No. We need a distraction.”

“Heero, no,” Wufei snapped under his breath.

“Go.” Heero stood and ran for a nearby slab on the opposite side of the entrance to their hide-away. Shots rang around him. He dove for the safety of the slab, a sharp pain slicing through his leg, right under his knee.

He grunted as he landed, taking in the damage. It had passed through – damn, they were getting lucky – and sliced right underneath his knee. Shit. That might take a while to heal.

Assuming, of course, that he lived.

He couldn't help but think of Duo now, of where he was. It had been two months since Quatre's last contact with him, and that had been short and sweet. All Heero had learned from it was that Quatre thought Duo was doing “all right” - whatever that meant.

There had to be more than one entrance to that damnable sewer, but the chances of him finding one before he was taken down were nonexistent. At least Wufei was safe. For now.

“One!” Wufei's voice shouted out, immediately followed by a blast to Heero's right – away from the hide-out.

Heero reacted immediately, racing for the entrance even as his mind supplied him with information – Wufei had thrown a gun on the hope that it would misfire once it landed. The enemies, after hearing the word 'one,' would be expecting a 'two' – a second attack.

Instead, Heero dove into safety, ignoring the searing pain in his leg.

“Thanks,” he gasped, rolling into a crouch. Before him stood Wufei, gazing at him in concern.

“You've been hit,” he whispered.

“We have to move,” Heero said grimly, knowing it would hurt like hell.

Wufei nodded, agreeing. “Can you?”

“I'm fine,” he answered.

“Then let's go.”

As one, they turned and trooped off deeper into the dark tunnels around them.


There was no light.

It was a darkness more complete than night, more complete than death. Heero couldn't see anything. Not Wufei, not incoming enemies, not even his own hand. It was a complete, total darkness. A place of nightmares, where demons could be lurking behind you and there was nothing you could do to stop them from devouring you.

Of course, Heero had never believed in ghosts or ghouls or demons. He wondered idly if Duo did. Probably not. For all the man's foolishness, he was still pragmatic enough to know the difference between fantasy and truth.

Wufei sighed. “I heard footsteps a minute ago.”

“As did I.” Heero's injury pulsed painfully. He absently searched for his leg in the dark, rubbed it. It was covered with blood. He and Wufei had stopped to bandage it before the darkness had become too complete, but it seemed now like the bandages weren't enough. “We have no provisions,” Heero murmured.

“And even if help did show up, they may not find us for quite a while.”

It seemed that Wufei had followed his own thoughts. “We may die here,” he said anyway.”


Heero was silent for a moment. “It's such a lame way to go,” he murmured wistfully, thinking of all the things he should have done.

Wufei was silent for a pregnant beat before saying softly, “that's what he said.”

“Hn?” Heero had no idea if he'd turned his head in the right direction, and lord knew he could see nothing, but an instinctive reaction made him turn toward Wufei's voice, nonetheless.

“Maxwell.” Just the name made a shiver race down Heero's spine. “When we were being held, and the oxygen went out... he said it was 'a lame way to go.'”

It made Heero smile. “He would.”

Wufei snorted. “Are... are you all right?”

Heero paused, wondering at Wufei's tone. Obviously he wasn't talking about his wound. “No,” he said finally.


They were silent again for a while. Heero had no idea what Wufei was doing to entertain himself within the darkness, but he was trying to imagine Duo as he looked now. Certainly the boyish face had grown older, more lean. But those eyes would still be wide.

“I loved him.”

Heero froze, his thoughts stuck on a certain 'him.' “What?”


Heero felt his spine stiffen in different places as the tensed places relaxed. “Treize?” he echoed. “You despised him... didn't you?”

Wufei's chuckle was humorless. “Oh, no. I despised his methods, his thinking. But in fact... the thing I hated, the thing I decided he needed to die for because it wasn't virtuous... I was wrong. I thought he fought war for no reason but his own wants, discounting those lost...” Wufei's pain was naked in his voice. It was the first time Heero had ever heard the Chinese warrior's voice like that.

But somehow, in the darkness, it seemed fitting for secrets to be laid bare. “I never knew, Wufei,” Heero murmured.

“I know. I didn't want you to.” Wufei laughed again. “It's too late for me. I killed him myself.”

Heero winced. “Wufei...”

“But you.” Heero couldn't see anything, but he knew without doubt that Wufei's steady eyes were trying to trap him in their gaze nonetheless. “You... it's not over for you. Not yet. That's why... that's why you have to find him, Yuy.”

Heero felt something in him clench tightly around his heart. It was hard to breathe. “I know. I've tried.”

Wufei hissed. “We're a pair, aren't we? Both suffering for love. Some incredible warriors we are.”

Heero's chuckled then was as dry as Wufei's. “Yes,” he whispered.

They were silent then, unable to speak more. The subject made more talking pointless.


Heero tried to move his leg and groaned. Talk about pain.


Well, that said something. They'd been here in the darkness for so long, Wufei was worried enough to say his first name. “Hn?”

“We can't last too much longer,” Wufei whispered, his throat sounding as dry as Heero's was.

“Hn.” He had to wonder just how long they'd been down here. There hadn't been any search parties lately, but trying to leave their safe little niche would be reckless and stupid. If they left and the enemy spotted them, they were dead. Their chances of living were practically nonexistent as they were. Jumping into death earlier would be stupid.

“Geez, Yuy, don't talk my ear off.”

Heero smiled. “Hn.”

Wufei fell into silence for a while, then, hesitantly, “Yuy?”


“You've had sex before, right?”

Despite how tired and thirsty and hungry he was, he managed to stiffen and stutter. “What?”

“No,” Wufei answered himself.

“Hey!” he snapped. “Yes, I have, dammit.” Once, on a failed mission to get a certain someone out of his head. “Why the hell...?” He was very glad Wufei couldn't see anything, either – he'd be mortified if his blush could be seen at that moment.

“Hm. I haven't had sex since... Treize died.”

A euphemism. Wufei wasn't a fan of them – it showed just how much pain losing Treize cause him. “Hn.”

Silence. Then, “hm.”

Heero closed his eyes, knowing what Wufei was trying to say. Heero hadn't been able to gain release with another person – ever. Not even that other person he'd had sex with... it had been an interesting little disaster, though he and the other person had been determined enough that he'd been able to stay hard for their benefit. But...

He didn't have to close his eyes to see Duo. Not in this darkness. It was easy to see whatever he wanted, to believe whatever he made himself see. For Wufei, too. And with his blood loss and the complete silence around him...

Every minute that passed sent him closer to death.

“I understand,” he breathed.

Still, he had to close his eyes, had to let his desires take control over his reason, to be able to turn and roll on top of his partner.

o_O You know, somehow, even though that's all I'm writing on that, it still feels... weird. Very disturbing. Then again, people do disturbing things sometimes...

This was a serious part of this storyline, one I was reluctant to allow happen, although I didn't really have a choice if this story was going to continue... I understand that this is going to be highly controversial. Any comments, both positive and inflammatory, would be appreciated.

Thanks for reading! I hope I didn't scare you all away... ><

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Every story unless otherwise claimed is Kayura's, and is copyrighted 2006 under her name.