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Disclaimer: You do know that Gundam Wing isn't mine... right?
He only stared at me, waiting. How could I answer that? The truth, so painful for me, would be too difficult for him to
bear. I gave him a lopsided grin. “When I write, Heero, it's more melodramatic than-”
“Duo, don't spare me.”
The grin flickered, then disappeared on a sigh. “It's not that you left me behind on purpose, Heero... it's just that
I wasn't able to follow.”
Those eyes cataloged my words, once again decoding them. “And you believe I continued on without you.”
Hadn't you? I wondered, but I dared not say it. The truth was that we'd both managed to continue under the grief, he'd
just gained more than me. That didn't mean he had suffered any less. “Look, when I write, it always comes out melancholy.
I have-”
“Of course it comes out melancholy,” Heero cut in. I wished his eyes couldn't rip through me like that. “Duo,
you were melancholy. Hadn't you noticed?”
Of course I had. Did he think me stupid? I scowled up at him, but the effect was wholly ruined by my being trapped on the
bed. “That has nothing to do with it,” I muttered. “I'd come back from a bad mission, that's all.”
“What kind of mission?”
If it were possible for the scowl to deepen, it did. “So a guy wanted me to find whoever'd raped and killed his wife,
okay? I had to get the files on the girl and everything and it sucked.”
“I see.” I wasn't ready for it; I never was. He leaned down and kissed my forehead, a warm pressure that seized
my heart. Whenever had Heero learned these acts of affection? “I will never,” he breathed, “leave you behind
again. I swear it.”
<*>
<<<<<<<*Two Years Ago*>>>>>>>
Heero tapped his fingers on the sofa table restlessly. The phone in his hand seemed to ring forever, and dammit but no one
was picking up.
Finally, finally Une answered her damn phone. “Yuy.”
“I'm calling in sick,” he said shortly. In his wait, he'd already managed to put on his lightweight coat to hide
his gun. He would flip out his Preventors badge if some high-handed official decided to get bossy, but it was unnecessary.
He wouldn't get caught with it unless he shot someone out in public. Which he may very well do.
Une snorted over the line. “Yuy, you never get sick.”
“I know. I said I'm calling in sick.” He opened the door and headed for his car, unwilling to wait for
the conversation to end before moving.
“And why, dare I ask, are you calling in sick?”
He could imagine the look on her face – slightly amused, slightly agitated. She would be tapping her pencil against
her desk right about now. If he listened closely, he could just make out the sound of its rapping. It almost made him smile.
“Wufei heard a man shouting in the streets, saying he would take out the Gundam pilots. He was asking people if they
knew where we were. He and I are going to meet up with him and save him the trouble of tracking us down one by one.”
Une was silent for a moment. Heero took the chance to unlock his car and step inside. He started it as she said, “then
why don't you call in your report?”
“Hn?” He wasted no time in exiting his driveway.
“I'll put you on the case. Apprehend that man, dead or alive. That way you don't have to waste your sick days.”
He smirked. How like her. “As if I use them,” he countered slightly.
“I don't care, Yuy. If he's targeting my men, I want him taken down. See to it.”
He hummed an inarticulate affirmative and flipped his phone closed. The discussion was over.
<*>
He met with Wufei outside the martial arts dojo where he'd heard the man's proclamations.
“Hello, Yuy.”
He sent Wufei a small, hardly discernible smile. “What did he say?”
“He said, and I quote, 'wherever those Gundam pilots are, I'll take them all down. Anyone here gonna tell me where they
are? I've got an appointment with the next one.'”
“'Next one'?” Heero repeated, feeling a swarm of panicked butterflies flutter inside him.
Wufei nodded. Both of them were a bit unused to showing emotions, but even Wufei couldn't hide his concern. “I highly
doubt he is an actual threat, but I will treat him as one nonetheless.”
Heero agreed. Duo, for all his cheerful exuberance, could take care of himself. Wherever he was.
Wufei holstered his gun and hid it under his own coat. It was July, far too hot for them to be comfortable. “Did you
tell her?”
“It's now a case” was his clipped response.
Wufei chuckled. “Of course it is. The woman's crazy.”
Heero chuckled dryly. “I'm aware. So where is he?” Wufei had undoubtedly followed the man, after all.
“I'll show you.” And Wufei moved off. Heero got into formation slightly behind him.
<*>
<<<<<<<*Present*>>>>>>>
The birds woke me up.
It had only been a week since Greaves and I had fought, and no one had heard from him since. He'd managed to disappear.
I, on the other hand, couldn't manage to stand. Of course I'd pushed it too far. It had been absolutely stupid to fight in
the condition I'd been in. Heero... hell, if I'd thought he had mother-hen tendencies before, he was fucking insane now. He
didn't let me do a fucking thing. I was watched more closely than Quatre.
The thought of Quatre brought a searing pain. Ever since the latest disaster, he hadn't come over at all. And it wasn't because
he was out of town. No, I knew without a doubt that it was because Trowa wasn't allowing him. Apparently I was too much of
a danger.
It hurt, not having my friend nearby. He had always been the one closest to me, the one who understood without my needing
to say a word. Where Heero had Wufei, I had Quatre.
Heero, of course, hadn't returned to Preventors yet. I had no idea how the man could simply boss around Une like that –
even I hadn't gone that far. Wasn't it dangerous?
“Duo?”
I turned my head to the sound. It was Heero, of course, waiting for entrance into my room. It was a ridiculous notion –
what, could I stop him? “Hey there, Heero.”
Heero opened the door then, a smile flickering across his face. “Hey,” he replied. In his hands sat a tray with
what looked to be soup and orange juice. I grinned. “Food?” I asked hopefully.
He chuckled. “Of course. Did you think I'd let you starve?”
“You? Momma-Yuy?” I snorted. “Not likely.”
Heero placed the tray on the nightstand beside me. A flick of his wrist snapped the lamp on. He used the extra light to study
me. “You look better,” he said finally. I had no idea what he meant; it wasn't like I'd just come out of the hospital.
I'd been here for a while, suffering through a day nurse. Heero turned to the food and picked up the soup.
Shit. We were still doing this.
I blushed as propped me up and scooted his chair – a permanent fixture by the bed – closer to me. I couldn't yet
hold things well – my stomach had the tendency to screw up even my good arm. I had to be fed by someone else. And of
course Heero had volunteered.
It was an absolutely humiliating experience. Never before had I gotten myself this messed up. Worse, even if I had, I knew
damn well that I never would have allowed it... if I hadn't just recently heard Heero's proclamation.
Even now the words echoed off the caverns of my mind randomly. I would hear them again while lying down wishing I had something
to occupy my time, or when reading, or sometimes eating or bathing – another humiliating situation, though this task
was performed by my day nurse.
The thought of it now made me smile. Those three words were...
“What?” Heero asked softly, ladling a spoonful of soup and holding it out for me.
I blushed to my toes. “Huh?” I accepted the food and wished I could turn into a puddle and melt into the bedding.
“Your smile. What brought it?”
Heero had also developed a curiosity that could absolutely not be appeased. Throwing sacrificial virgins into a volcano probably
wouldn't even make him pause for a breath when he got going. I cleared my throat and took another bite before answering. “Uh,
just remembering...”
Heero quirked an eyebrow. “Remembering what?”
I scowled, this time almost forgetting that I was supposed to eat. “The day I woke up,” I mumbled around the food.
It was harder to swallow, admitting that little peach.
“Hmm.” Heero closed his eyes and leaned back for a moment. “Mine was a bit too bittersweet at the time,
but now I suppose I can appreciate the words.” I felt guilt and sadness take a chunk out of me, but Heero's face was
sporting a strange little smile. “After all...” Heero said, focusing those eyes back on me and carefully spooning
up another bit of food. “It broke the barrier between us.”
I was too shocked to be able to respond, and Heero took the opportunity to stuff the spoon into my mouth. I took far too much
time chewing, thinking about what Heero had said. It was silent then as Heero respected my mood.
It was when he was packing everything back up that I spoke up. “I didn't mean to make it a bad memory.”
Heero turned to stare at me with what could only be shock on his face. The bowl he held sat limply in his hands. “Duo,
it isn't like that.” Without looking at the tray, he placed the bowl on it and placed his hand over mine. I blushed
hard enough to stain. “Yes, I was scared, but I... I was happy, too. Happy to hear that you love me.”
His spoke those words far too easily. It made the blush even worse. “I didn't want to go without...” but saying
that brought a sad look to Heero's face, so I switched. “I didn't say anything at first because I thought you'd never...”
Shit, that wasn't good, either. “I-I mean...”
Heero squeezed my hand tightly. “Duo.”
“It was during the war.” I had no idea why I was telling him all this. “At first it was kind of like hero
worship. You were freaking invincible, and I knew I'd never be able to measure up.”
Heero scowled at me. “What?”
“But then it became more about... you as a whole, but you were the soldier and I knew that came first to you. As it
should have. But... I started thinking that there was no way...” I'd thought that from the beginning, dammit. But I
was going to edit the hell out of this for his sake. “And packed it up.”
Heero sat, patiently listening. But those damn insightful eyes of his seemed to be processing something. That was never good.
“You were thinking you would die after the battle with Greaves.”
I winced. “I hadn't gone out expecting that,” I argued, knowing it was a feeble defense. “I told you –
he had some sort of enhancements made on him. It was harder than it should have been.”
That scowl came back. “It would have been easier if-”
“No,” I snapped heatedly. “It was a battle between us. It wasn't yours to get involved in.”
Heero gave me a sharp look. “Of course it was. I've loved you for years, Duo. I couldn't take the chance that I would
lose you.”
I winced. Okay, he had a point. And it made my chest hurt to hear he'd loved me for years. “So much lost time...”
I hadn't realized I'd spoken aloud until Heero responded. “I know.”
Of course the reason it had taken so long was because I'd run off. Thinking about the pain I'd gone through every day of those
three damn years, it made me feel so stupid. And then to continue with my stupidity even after seeing him again! What the
hell was wrong with me?
“I should have told you,” Heero murmured. It snapped me out of my little mental pit.
“Huh?” I asked brightly.
“When you returned... no, before that. We'd had time, but I'd never said anything. You were always so happy; I kept
telling myself I had time.”
I backpedaled quickly. “Whoa, whoa. Uh...” I blinked. “Wait, what? You liked me back before I left?”
Heero seemed taken aback by my words. “Of course.”
I tried to digest that. “Uh, all you guys said was that you were talking to Wufei during my month's stay...” Although
he had said things earlier that hinted at a long span of time... I'd just figured he'd come to the realization after the time
I'd left.
Heero sighed. “I liked you during the war, Duo.”
That pierced through me... strangely. “Even then?” I tried to see the old Heero liking much of anything and felt
my brain cells fry.
Heero sighed and picked up the tray, standing as he did so. “How couldn't I, Duo?” he asked me, though his eyes
were no longer on me. “During the war, you always had a smile for everyone. I thought it a sign of incompetence at first,
but it became so much of a solace that I...” He shrugged. “I began depending on it.”
He made his exit then, in true Hollywood style, closing the door behind him. And I, following the clichéd script perfectly,
stared after him for a long period of time.
Finally I scowled and turned away, embarrassed as hell. Fade to black.
<*>
<<<<<<<*Two Years Ago*>>>>>>>
“Here?” Heero asked dubiously, staring at the completely normal suburban neighborhood house. White building, dark
blue shutters, empty garden patch. It could be owned by any bachelor – or even bachelorette – in the world.
“No, I just decided to stare at this house.” Wufei pulled out his gun and checked it over.
Heero cocked his brow at the sarcasm and did the same with his own gun. “What does he look like?”
“Slightly broad, weight approximately one-sixty, height approximately six foot. Blond hair, long, eyes brown.”
Wufei snapped his magazine closed and glared at the house. “Shall we?”
Heero hummed an affirmative. His thoughts scattered slightly, wondering what the man meant. Next one? Had he really hurt Duo
in some way? Was Duo...?
He gritted his teeth. No. Duo had survived the war, after all.
Though... Heero closed his eyes for a split second. Though Duo had been the one to get caught more than anyone else. Half
of it was because the man was sacrificing himself, but Heero had to admit that the other half was because of the idiot's recklessness.
Had Duo been reckless again, without Heero around to bail him out?
Heero clenched his gun hard. There was only one way to find out.
<*>
<<<<<<<*Present*>>>>>>>
Mr. Zencroft was the devil.
I decided that after he made his first house call and liberally tortured the hell out of me. Today, being the second such
visit from hell, he took the chance to inform me that it was my fault for getting myself injured even worse. Like I wanted
to hear logic when I was in agony.
I glared at him as he left the room, my bad mood not the least bit abated by his blessed absence. I could hear Heero's voice,
indistinct with distance, speaking with Evil Incarnate on my lack of progress, which would continue until I could at least
stand. I scowled.
Finally, blessedly, I heard that door close. I waited impatiently for Heero's return, the catch-all sign that the torture
had officially passed. I found it telling that he was never nearby while I “exercised.”
The door opened, and I caught Heero's concerned gaze before he smiled at me. “How are you?”
“Humph.” I cast my glare in his direction. After all, he'd left me alone with that sadist.
He chuckled. “How about we-”
He was interrupted by the doorbell. Heero turned to the sound and grinned. “They're here,” he murmured.
I cocked an eyebrow at him and watched him disappear. They? I strained my ears, but I couldn't hear anything other than the
security system beeping out a warning that the door had been opened. Who was it now? Heero had worn a secret little smile,
more like a smirk. What the hell was he up to?
Then there were footsteps tracing their way to me. Footsteps and... a wheelchair?
I felt hope spring up in my chest just as the door opened – and there, with Wufei behind him, sat Quatre, positively
beaming at me.
“Quatre!” I shouted with joy, shining my biggest grin at him. If I could have, I would have bounced up and down
in happiness.
Wufei snorted as he wheeled Quatre inside. “How come I never get such a welcome, Maxwell?”
I didn't even flick him a glance. “Quatre, how are you?” He looked much better now. It seemed that his pallor
was darker, and he wasn't as hunched in one himself as he'd been the last time I'd seen him. The number of bandages also seemed
to have decreased.
“I'm well, Duo. And you?” His eyes raked over me, that grin of his falling into a frown as he looked me over.
I, unlike him, hadn't made much progress. Unless one considered the fact that I'd become progressively worse.
“I feel better than I look,” I assured him.
He gave me a dubious look.
“Maxwell,” Wufei chuckled, “if you felt as bad as you looked, you'd probably be dead.”
I sent him a half-glare. “Oh yeah? Well if I were dead I wouldn't be feeling worse, now would I?” I sent him a
mocking sneer. Hah! That little tete-a-tete was mine.
Quatre laughed. “It seems your morbid sense of humor is in good condition, at least.”
I cocked him a grin. “Of course.” But then I looked at him seriously. “Quatre, you're going to catch hell
for this. I know damn well Trowa doesn't know you're over here.”
Quatre scowled. It was strange to see such a look on the normally placid blond's face. “That bastard,” he snarled,
and I thought I would choke on the shock, “doesn't ever want me to be near you. I can't believe his nerve! What the
hell's wrong with him? He can go straight to-”
“Whoa, whoa.” I almost made the mistake of lifting my hands up, but I thought Heero would gun for me if I did.
“When did this happen? What's going on?”
Quatre turned to me, his eyes earnest. “You have always been my closest friend, Duo,” he said. I felt guilt hit
like the vacuum of space, sucking me in, leaving me adrift. “We always understood each other, even during the war, despite
our different backgrounds. You were there for me, even when you weren't there physically. Trowa wants me to forget all that.
To forget you. I won't.”
I didn't know what to think. Quatre was arguing with Trowa over me? There were strains in their relationship because of me?
Because... because I was such a close friend of Quatre's. Because Quatre still held me in high regard, and Trowa couldn't
understand why. “He's worried about you,” I whispered, hoping to salvage their relationship somehow.
“I know that,” Quatre snapped. “I also know I won't let him take you away from me.” He wheeled himself
forward and touched my hand. “Duo. Don't think this is your fault, okay? It's between Trowa and me.”
I scowled. “You're arguing over me, Quatre. How doesn't that involve me?”
Quatre leaned forward, enough to make me worry about his recuperating wound. “I told you, you're my best friend. I know
Trowa's worried that I'll be hurt, but being kept away from you hurts. Especially now, when you're wounded like this and recuperating
and you may be attacked again.”
I didn't want to think about that too hard. “Well, the attack thing...” I sighed, one big long whoosh. I saw Heero
and Wufei slip out of the room, making nonsense noises about tea, and waited until they were gone. “I...” Shouldn't
bother you with this sort of thing.
“You're scared, aren't you.”
It wasn't really a question, but I nodded anyway. “I can't do anything as I am now. And Caribol...”
Quatre nodded his head in understanding. “I know. It hurts to have those you care about in danger.”
Guilt sucked me back up again. Shit. “Qat, I don't want you and Trowa fighting.”
Quatre's eyes waffled for a bit before he admitted, “I don't want us fighting, either. But,” he warned, “I'm
not letting it go. I won't stay away from you. Duo... would you stay away from me, if Heero ordered it? And I was really hurt?”
I thought about it, then sighed. “Not even for him,” I murmured. Because Quatre truly was my closest friend.
Quatre nodded. “There. See? Though I don't think Heero would ever do that. He's very reliable.”
“So's Trowa.” I carefully didn't say either 'is' or 'was'. “I always thought of him as the most level-headed
of us all.”
Quatre frowned. “Not about me, he isn't.”
“Sometimes that's a good thing,” I said. I didn't want these two to fall apart. They really were made for each
other. Trowa just... hated my guts. With a passion. “He's just really worried about you, and he doesn't trust me all
that much. Just think about it, Quatre. If Trowa were practically pining away for someone for years, someone who never seemed
to return his concern-”
“But you did worry about me!” Quatre interrupted. “I know; it was in all of your cards, all of your phone
calls. You felt guilty about it all the time. I...”
I winced. It was true, but I didn't know it was so plain. I'd tried to keep it hidden. Tried to make Quatre feel that I was
happy. “But he didn't know that, Quatre. How could he? He doesn't know me the way you do.”
“But...” Quatre considered it for a moment. Then he sighed. “I still have the cards. Maybe showing them
to him will...”
Heero entered the room, hands empty of any supposed tea. His eyes zeroed in on Quatre. “Sorry, Quatre.” The blond's
eyes dimmed, narrowed. He scowled, but there was a line of stress and fatigue between his brows. “Time's up. Trowa found
out.”
<*>
You know, I just realized that this is a lot like a bad soap opera. -_-;
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